Saturday, 7 July 2012

"But mommy, I love him."

I've come to the conclusion that my babies are growing up way too fast. I know that's something that people say all the time, but I never thought it would feel this way. Like time is in fast forward, and all I can do is watch everything speed by.

Ciena is starting to really become a little lady, although I use that term loosely;) She cares about her appearance, having her hair neat, and clothes that match are important to her. She paints her nails, wears lip gloss....I could go on. It's amazing to me, I mean, I remember when I was 6. Um, yeah. I certainly couldn't be bothered with brushing my hair, and lip gloss, and nail polish probably would have ended up all over the walls.
She is so smart, she loves school, and she loves learning and challenging herself. She has so much more confidence in herself than I ever did. I love that.
She is in love. *sigh* Justin Bieber, I know, I know. She's 6!! 6 years old and already having celebrity crushes? I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready to hear my 6 year old talk about marrying some pretty boy pop tart. Or to hear her say  "But mommy, I love him." Noooooo!

Joely, what a kid. The potty trained thing still blows my mind, seriously right when I thought we were never going to accomplish it. Bam! He got it, and we haven't looked back.
He is so smart. I know, right?! My kids are geniuses y'all! He can count to almost 30, he can identify quite a few numbers, and letters, and he can work my phone almost as well as me!
Listening to him talk is so much fun. Toddler logic is pretty hilarious. He just has so much to say, and he is not afraid to say what needs to be said. I just love this age, when they start to transform into this little complex person. With opinions, and strong likes and dislikes.
He loves to snuggle. At night, in bed, he simply cannot fall asleep unless he is in the crook of my arm, and holding my hand. I'm sure sometime soon that will have to change....but for right now, I'm pretty alright with it.

Logan. Well, he's only 5 1/2 months old, so it REALLY seems like he's growing too fast.
He watches everything around him. Like, intently. Like he's trying to figure everything out. He is very aware of everything, the sound of a familiar voice will make him turn his entire body towards it.
He definitely recognizes people. Tonight my mom came through the door, and as soon as her heard her voice, he got very excited, and craned his body to get her in his sights. When daddy comes through the door at the end of the day, the squealing, and smiles make us laugh. He loves his daddy.

I love these kids so much. Nobody prepares you for that kind of love. The "do anything for you" kind of love. It's breathtaking. I have been a little down lately. I have went back and forth on the thought of having another baby(not anytime soon) I really don't feel "done" but I think about another pregnancy, and worrying myself silly for another 9 months. I think about gaining more weight, when it's been all I can do to take of the weight from these pregnancies. I think about a 4th c-section, and whether or not my body could handle it. And I also think about the worrying that I go through daily with these 3. It's never ending, time consuming, bite your tongue, hold your breath, is she warm? Is he wheezy? Don't fall! Don't jump! Don't run! And I wonder if I would ever be capable of doing it all again? I guess only time will tell if it will happen or not. I think as of right now we're 90% sure we're done, but it's that 10% that tears at my heart.

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