I am really amazed at how tired I feel every morning. I swear I wake up and think, "I have never felt so tired in my life." Then the next day comes, and I realise I was wrong.
I keep hoping that sometime soon Logan will sleep longer than 3 hours at a time during the night. Even though I know I should thank my lucky stars that he sleeps that long. And he really is a dream to get back to sleep too. The odd night(last night) he just won't sleep in between feedings. He just wouldn't settle. That accompanied with the fact that we had a toddler crowding our bed for some reason, makes for a pretty tired mommy.
I feel so unaccomplished lately. I mean, there are days where I feel like supermom. I get the housework done, I keep the kids from killing each other, and manage to throw something together for dinner. But more often than not, I feel like I fail at motherhood. The baby cries all day, Ciena, and Joel fight all day long, the house is a disaster, and there's simply nothing I can do about that. Those days suck! I hate living in chaos, it makes me feel panicky, almost like something i wrong...I just don't know what. This week has been even worse because our washer broke. Rob keeps saying that he will take a look at it and see if it's an easy fix. I hope it is, or at least a cheap fix, because a new washer is really not in the budget right now. But the laundry is piling up, so something needs to be done or I'll be headed to mama's with all the laundry this weekend. Actually, that's not a bad idea. Maybe I could get her to fold everything;)